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The Basics #3:
Unnatural Feelings

What every eight-year-old should know
and most adults have never been taught
about the emotions that run our lives.

ABOUT GUILT

Since guilt is not a natural, necessary emotion, it blocks and wastes our energy.

GUILT IS A COVER-UP FOR ANGER WHICH LEAVES US FEELING SAD.

We wonder: "Why am I so sluggish and irritable?"

On the surface we feel: SAD or DEPRESSED

We've been telling ourselves things like:
"I shouldn't be angry. I should be understanding."
"That person didn't mean to hurt me."
"I'm too sensitive."
"I should just take the mistreatment."
"I don't deserve better."

Down deep we feel: ANGRY

Make A Conscious Choice:
Will I admit to myself that I'm angry
or will I keep feeling guilty and be depressed?

BE PROUD OF YOUR ANGER!
It's there to protect you. Let it do its job!

ABOUT SHAME

Since shame is not a natural, necessary emotion, it blocks and wastes our energy.
SHAME IS A DEEP BELIEF IN OUR OWN WORTHLESSNESS.
IT COMES DIRECTLY FROM BEING SHAMED AS A CHILD.

We wonder: "Why don't I seem to care what happens to me like other people do?"

On the surface we feel: VERY SAD and "HOPELESS."

We've been telling ourselves things like:
"I'm no good. I just don't feel worthwhile."
"I wonder what's wrong with me, but most of the time I just don't care."
"I might as well have a drink (or a drug, or take a big risk)."

Down deep we feel: MOSTLY SAD, BUT FEARFUL AND ANGRY TOO.

Make A Conscious Choice:
Will I keep believing those people who shamed me
or will I treat myself well and be happier?

KNOW THAT ANYONE WHO SHAMED YOU WAS WRONG!

ABOUT IMAGINED FEAR

Since imagined fear is not a natural, necessary emotion, it blocks and wastes our energy.
IMAGINED FEAR IS A FEELING WE CREATE
TO COVER DEEPER FEELINGS WHICH BOTHER US MORE.

We wonder: "Why am I so afraid?"
" Why do I always ask: 'What if?'"
"Why don't I stop scaring myself?"

On the surface we feel: FEAR

We've been telling ourselves:
"I hate being afraid."
"I wish I could do what other people do, and not be afraid."
"I wish I'd stop thinking about every single bad thing that could happen."

Down deep we feel: USUALLY SAD. SOMETIMES SHAME (See "Shame.")

Make A Conscious Choice:
Will I always feel scared
or will I face and overcome my deeper bad feelings?

FACE WHAT YOU FEEL THAT BOTHERS YOU MORE!
You will get past the deeper feelings. But creating fear can last forever!

ALL OTHER CREATED FEELINGS THAT FEEL BAD

It is possible to create any feeling - and any created feeling that feels bad
will block and waste our energy.

All imagined feelings are habitual feelings we create
to cover deeper, real feelings that bother us more.

We wonder:
"Why do I keep feeling this same feeling all the time,
even when I know it's not necessary?"

On the surface we feel: THE CREATED FEELING.

We've been telling ourselves: "I hate feeling this all the time."
"I wish I'd feel and do a wider range of things like other people do."
"Why can't I stop making myself feel this way."

Down deep we feel:
REAL FEELINGS THAT SEEM TOO MUCH TO HANDLE.

Make A Conscious Choice:
Will I keep feeling this way
or will I face and overcome the deeper bad feelings?

YOU CAN OVERCOME THE DEEPER FEELINGS ALONE OR WITH HELP
BUT THE HABITUAL FEELING YOU ARE CREATING COULD GO ON FOREVER!

Face the feelings that bother you more!
Stop covering them with your "favorite" bad feeling!

These three topics ("The Basics")
contain the most important information I have for you.

I originally wrote "The Basics" around 1985 in a different format
and I have given it to everyone in my family, all my clients, and many of my friends.

I refer to these concepts many times every day in my work with others
and in dealing with my own dilemmas.

I sincerely hope you will keep this information readily available
and use it frequently.
Use it whenever you feel stuck in bad feelings,
when you want to feel more joy and excitement,
and when you feel the healthy urge to look inward.

I WISH YOU THE RICHEST, HEALTHIEST, HAPPIEST LIFE YOU CAN ARRANGE


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Enjoy Your Changes!

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Write To Me, I Want To Hear From You!
Tony Schirtzinger, Therapist (Milwaukee) 

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