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Fantasy and Reality - Part 2

Part One was mostly theoretical.
Part Two is more practical.



SUMMARY OF PART ONE

      1. Fantasy is all mental activity.

      2. Reality is what we know through our senses.

      3. Fantasy should only be used for entertainment and for brief problem solving.


HOW IT HELPS TO TELL THE DIFFERENCE

Remember the great relief you felt when you realized
that some nightmare was only a dream?
Remember that feeling of great joy when it seemed
that some dream had come true?

As we improve at differentiating between fantasy and reality
we get these wonderful feelings more and more!



FEAR

One of the greatest problems we face is unnecessary and unnatural fear.
It is destructive to believe our fears!

Fears are only fantasies about horrors.
Spending time on them is painful, and a waste of energy.



HOPE

Hope, like fear, is just a fantasy.
But hope feels good!

So, never stop enjoying your hope!



OUR "WORLD VIEW"

Each of us has a unique, completely different idea about how the world works.
Some of us think "love makes the world go 'round,"
others think "everything is about power," or money, or trust, or being well-liked....
The list is endless.

But the truth is that nobody really knows how the world works.

It can be comforting to know we are all wrong,
and yet somehow we all survive
(and most of us do it quite well, thank you!).



WHAT TO DO AND HOW IT WORKS

Immerse yourself in your fantasies
and in your reality
separately.

Then, when you get good at never confusing the two,
add a little of the fantasy to your reality just for the fun of it!


Improve your sex life by enjoying your fantasies completely,
enjoying real sex intensely,
and occasionally enhancing sexual reality with sexual fantasy.

Improve your career by enjoying your dreams of success completely,
enjoying your daily work as much as you can,
and enhancing daily work with your dreams occasionally.

Improve relationships with children by enjoying your hopes about them,
enjoying their real growth,
and "sprinkling" your hopes into your daily enjoyment of them.



SEE HOW IT WORKS?

Any aspect of your life can be improved by
first immersing yourself in reality,
then in fantasy
- keeping them separate most of the time,
and occasionally "sprinkling" reality with fantasy
just for the sheer fun of it.



ABOUT MAKING MAJOR DECISIONS

When we need to make major decisions
(relationships, career changes, etc.),
fantasy can get in the way.

When faced with important life decisions,
do your best to measure the REALITY of your situation
against what you WANT.

Example #1:
When deciding about a career move, measure the guarantees offered to you against the kind of employment situation you want. While your hope may involve future promotions and other "possibilities," you are usually better off making your decision based on what you know for sure about the new situation.

Example #2:
When deciding about a partner, measure the reality of how they treat you against how you want to be treated. While your hope may be that they will change for the better, and you may fear that they will change for the worst, you are better off making your decision based on what you have actually observed about them.


Please Tell Your Friends About This Site.

Enjoy Your Changes!

Everything here is designed to help you do just that!

Relationship
Analysis



Write To Me, I Want To Hear From You!
Tony Schirtzinger, Therapist (Milwaukee) 

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