Q: My wife has become a frigid prune in bed. When talking doesn’t help and sex life has just about died is divorcing a good thing to do? Before we married she sucked my dick & & fucked a lot now I have to almost beg. The other night she started and wanted to just stop and leave me in the lurch so I just held her and continued

A: If she wanted to stop, you should have stopped. If you don’t, this can feel like rape to her!

This letter seems to indicate that you think you “own” your wife. Maybe that’s one of the reasons she isn’t interested in sex. Sex is supposed to be Play and Fun, not something deadly serious.

I suggest that you either go to couple’s counseling together, or that you see a therapist alone or together. A therapist who is wise about sex would be best (sex therapists).

Divorce is one option. Yes. But you would both carry the same problems you’ve had in this relationship into the next one. If there’s violence in this relationship and there are good reasons for your wife or you to be afraid, then I’d definitely suggest a divorce or at least a time of being apart while such dangerous things get dealt with and stopped.

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